The Other Side of Me

A dark alley,
With puddles of blood scattered.
A neon green light flickering,
And utter silence.
Yes, it is a dull, gloomy picture;
A picture most would stay away from.
But not I.
I live, grow, mature here.
I devour gloom.
I find solace in loneliness.
I make sure I die,
So that another life can live.
And in giving, I receive.
I know pain,
I know suffering,
I know what it feels,
To have no feelings at all.
I strive, to live through it all.
I stand, on my own,
Learning from the past.

There is good.
I refuse to believe there is not.
I will not bow,
To any insult or humiliation
Done to my sacrifices;
For I sacrifice for those
Who are worth.
I don't belong to the clouds,
Nor to the heavens above,
But to mere soil,
That too, deep within.
Nothing can change that,
No amount of pain or suffering, and
No amount of disappointment.

I was made to feel,
And feel I will,
For the countless hearts
That beat for joy,
For tears galore,
Wasted every second
By undeserving idiots,
For millions of smiles,
Lost in emptiness.

I refuse to be let down,
By someone else's mistakes.
Enough of ruining lives.
Now, I will make a worthy one,
That deserves, not pain,
No hardships nor sacrifices,
But love, happiness, joy,
And independence.

-Me

Tired of Holding on to Nothing

They started off as
Two inseparable soulmates.
When one whispered in his heart,
The other listened and felt.
When one hurt himself,
The other bore the pain.
When one was lost,
The other was there to find him.

And then...
Between them, came,
A wall of understanding.
As peculiar as it may seem,
Understanding tore them apart.
This huge wall, the other climbed,
To seek and find him,
And return with him.
This huge wall,
Grew smoother and slipperier,
Making it hard for her,
To reach the top.
Many a times she fell,
Many a times she bruised herself,
Many a times, even when things seemed hopeless,
She never gave up.
While climbing this
Slippery, steep Everest,
She saw him.
She saw him busy,
She saw him not care,
She saw him laugh away...
Did he mirth at her foolishness?
Or was he just too happy to care?
She couldn't understand this,
Did he not care anymore?
Was he too stuck to his comfortable side,
Of this huge, formidable wall,
To look out for her?
She called out to him,
She called out for him,
He heard, never listened,
To her share of miseries.
Yet she called again,
He looked but didn't see,
The hardships she faced.
She tried once more,
He turned but didn't notice,
How she gave herself away.

Then arose out of the wall,
Thorns, of all broken promises,
Forgotten verses, abused dreams.
Piercing her straight through her heart,
Leaving it bleeding profusely.

She let go of the footholds,
To fall on the hard ground,
Never to climb the wall again,
Never to fall in love again.
She got up,
Brushed the dust off as before,
But didn't look back the wall anymore.
Instead, she began carving her own path,
On her side of the wall,
To lead her life the way she wanted to,
Where people would conquer mountains for her,
Where others would,
Give up being understood,
To understand her.
Where love had only one definition:
Her happiness.

-Me

Only...

Only one dream,
Only one hope,
Only one desire,
To achieve...
What? The mind knows not.
A cluster of images,
Forming day by day,
Giving substance
To an endless wait.
Filling gaps and holes,
Covering up voids,
Only to someday,
Reveal them.

Only one regret,
Of only one loss,
For only one time,
And then, despair to be fought.
In a pool of tears,
Spreading around,
Flowing boundless,
With unnatural energy.
The effect too harsh,
And unfathomable consequences,
Only to, someday,
Be wiped forever.

Only one thought,
Only one path,
Only one life,
To live...
How? The heart knows not.
The very essence,
Of movement,
However slight,
Yet alive.
Struggling to move,
With emotions restraining,
Only to, someday,
Cease living.

-Me